about us
Hey, Randall and Scarlett Here
"We believe in being proactive and intentional on building stronger relationships in our stepfamily, so we are healthier mentally and physically and growing closer together instead of pulling apart."
Our Mission
To bring you information, encouragement, and support so you are able to overcome any stepfamily challenge you face or could face in the future, and to see your marriage and your kids relationships growing closer together.
Our Values
We strive to be honest and transparent so you know you’re not alone, and to share God’s love and his words that provide us with the encouragement and healing we need to see us and our family healthy.
Who Are We Anyways???
Here's A Little Of What We Do And What We've Done:
- Blended Family Coaches
- Teachers and Educators
- Youth and Kids Leaders
- Ordained Pastors
- Public and Small Group Speakers
- 15+ Years Married in a Blended Family
- Both Raised In Blended Families
- Okay, That's Enough Let's Move On
“I appreciate you guys being vulnerable and real and encouraging through your posts. We need more ministries like this.
Victoria Ross
Why Do We Do What We Do???
It’s not always easy being in a stepfamily!
- There are times you want to quit, throw in the towel.
- There are times when you feel like you'll never have any kind of relationship with your stepkid, let alone a good relationship.
- There are times when your marriage is struggling and you both see things differently on how to raise your kids.
- There are times when you and the ex's are frustrated with each other.
- There are times when you feel like a stranger in your own house.
It Started With Love!
Both of our first marriages led in a divorce with kids. We met in 2007 and married in 2008. When we married, we both had full custody of our kids, Scarlett’s biological son was 7 years old and daughter was 4 years old. Randall’s biological daughter was 8 years old.
(our unofficially fostered 17 year old youth student didn’t come into our family until 2016)
It was love! This marriage was going to be perfect. The happy family. We were going to get it right this time! (so we thought)
We sure did learn a lot!
Then all the stepfamily drama started hitting one-by-one.
Right when you thought you’d overcome one obstacle, another would hit even harder. Don’t get me wrong, we had a whole lot of good times, too. (soccer, band, dance, awesome birthday parties, and some really fun trips) But we were definitely not prepared for everything we were going to face.
A few years in, our marriage almost ended, we were in constant disagreements with both our ex’s, and got to know the court system way too much.
We knew this wasn’t how we wanted our family to be. So we turned to God, grew in his words, and looked for every resource we could find. (there wasn’t much for stepfamilies)
Fast Forward Some Years!!!
We were able to overcome [marriage issues, court battles, kid drama, stepkid drama, depression, anxiety, adhd/add, cutting, drugs, kids leaving to go live with their other parents one-by-one,] just to name some of it.
We didn’t just overcome, but we found out how to handle things so much easier. In fact, the more we learned, the more peace we found, and that’s what brought our family closer together.
Now our kids are young adults, and we have some of the best relationships with them. (We even had our first Grandbaby!!! She is the cutest)
That’s Why We Do What We Do!!!
You don’t have to go through it alone! We get you!
We want you to have all the things you need to be able to overcome any stepfamily challenge you face. Then we can show you ways to avoid a lot of the drama. That way you can become more proactive, instead of reactive.
We want you to be able to take the ‘STEP’ out of your stepfamily, so you can create the Blended Family you ENJOY!!!
So what's the difference between a Stepfamily and a Blended Family?
They’re the same thing! We see the word ‘Stepfamily’ as more of a negative word for family and ‘Blended Family’ as more of a positive word for family.
We want to turn our ‘Stepfamily’ into a ‘Blended Family’!
That's What I Want, So What's My Next Steps?
First Thing,
Follow our weekly Episodes either on Podcast or Youtube (you can find us on any podcast platform you like).
Second Thing,
Download our FREE resource, this Stepfamily Jumpstart will help you see stronger family connections.
"We found that when we finally quit complaining and learn some stuff and do some stuff, we find more joy and more fulfillment in our family. You can, too! Keep up the great work!"
Randall and Scarlett Tandy